So, I crashed into a wall at about an hour ago. Not literally; don't fret. Just one of those walls that jump out at you while you're shuffling along at half-a-jog, keeping up the energy, keeping up the positives, keeping up the motivation. That wall says, "Maybe not," and all of a sudden you're sitting in mud at the base, with brick-burn on your face, looking up.
Maybe that metaphor was too extended.
My brain has reached capacity. I can't find the right music. Countdowns. Words (listen to how the keys click). A general state of shaking, deep breaths, long blinks.
Joel said today, "You're certainly not alone in your uncertainty." There is a hopefulness in that, a solidarity, an essence of community. My brain is muddled with abstractions, with trying to speak what I feel and trying to feel what's right.